Expected Exercise Delight

I've been trying to work exercise into my schedule and have taken a weekday errand that could easily be an unusable period of time and injected some quality exercise into it.

My son has a class that he takes at the Windsor Regional Children's Centre and it's not far from our home but since it's only an hour long and the traffic is heavy along the various routes home, it makes better sense just to stay close by.

I could sit in the waiting room and read a magazine, watch various children's videos, or try to complete a stationary task. With the weather being nice, however, I opted to get an outdoor workout in.

This past week it was exceptionally warm so I left my doggie at home because I didn't trust her to last very long in the heat and in case I decided to head indoors to climb the nearby hospital's stairs, I didn't want to leave her in a suffocatingly, hot car.

I began with a walk/jog that took me blocks away to a wonderful paved trail that parellels some railway tracks. I love that the route is open and safe even though the neighborhood could be viewed as questionable in some parts.

After 30 minutes I was overheating so I headed to the Windsor Regional Western Hospital to try out those stairs. I was a little apprehensive. Would I be stopped by a volunteer or staff member because I didn't have a legitimate reason to visit the hospital premises?

I was pleasantly pleased to find that wasn't the case. In fact, once I entered the West side entrance, there was a welcoming poster that beakoned me to take the stairs!

"Well this is nice", I thought to myself.

I began the accent and was even more pleased to find encouraging posters on each level of the stairway. It seems the hospital was promoting stair climbing (most likely for it's staff, but I was happy to oblige). Each poster talked about the benefits of using the stairs in calorie burning, muscle and cardio health. At the top, I was instructed to celebrate by dancing like Rocky Balboa! I didn't have the energy to but it made me smile.

After 20 minutes of that, I was done. I was still overheated and it was time to head back to pick up Trysten. In my stair travels I noticed the basement door and saw a sign pointing to a hallway that lead to a nearby building. I recalled having used the basement hallway before with a friend who was going to a diabetic clinic. Hmmm....secret, air-conditioned tunnel. This could be fun!

I decided to go for it. It would be far more pleasant to walk underground to my destination that go back out in the beating sun.

Again I was pleasantly surprised. The hallway was clearly marked as a 400 meter journey for "Hall Walkers". The atmosphere was pleasant and definitely made to encourage exercisers in their journey.

When I emerged from the continuing care Malden Park building, I was just a short distance from where Trysten was waiting. Very convenient.

Kudos to Windsor Regional Western & the Malden Park facility for creating a fitness-friendly environment for their staff, volunteers and for happen-stance visitors. It was a terrific, unexpected adventure that I will repeat again.

Nut Milk Bag News

Today I was elated to find a solution to a minor, but nagging problem.

My recipe for almond milk calls for the use of a nut milk bag for straining and then squeezing the "milk" from the almond puree. I reached for the cheesecloth I had on hand but after several recipe preparations had to admit that using a narrow strip of the woven fabric was not ideal. Too easy for the almond grinds to slip out the sides. Too much effort expended just trying not to let go of perfect noose-like grip to give the bundle a good squeezing out.

I asked in some of my usual grocery stores and got blank stares. Nut milk what?

I made a special trip to William's Kitchen Supplies. Surely if anyone carried this item, they would. Nope.

"Do you sew?", they asked.

"Not if I don't have to", I replied.

I then received the advice of buying some butter cloth and sewing my own nut milk bag. I thought about it but that's as far as it went. I may seem like I'm willing to do anything but I hadn't exhausted all my options yet. Isn't making my own almond milk enough? Do I have to prove my prowess as a seamstress as well?

I looked online and yes, nut milk bags are for sale, but they cost roughly $10-20 for one. Kind of steep for a mesh bag with no zippers or drawstring..

This week however, after a particularly trying session with a strip of cheesecloth, I checked the internet again. I was going to find a local supplier and buy the nut milk bag this weekend!

This search brought me to a forum where participants discussed the merit of using paint straining bags or clean pantyhose to do the job. Interesting. I could definitely do a visit to Lowes for paint straining bags. Pantyhose was a little out there even for me.

In the end I purchased a package of 12 paint straining bags for roughly the same price as one of the quote on quote "real" nut milk bags. Funny, they look the same to me. Such a deal!

It has been a couple days now since I journalled this experience. I wanted to hold off adding it to my blog until I actually tried out the paint straining bag. It worked beautifully. It is wide enough for the elastic edging to go completely around the rim of my large measure bowl and to contain the entire recipe of almond milk. It was easy to handle and I was able to squeeze out every drop that I could with my hands with no almond puree escaping.

Emptying the puree into my compost bin and rinsing out the bag for reuse was a cinch! I am definitely sold on this and am happy to have solved this very pressing deterant to making my own almond milk.

Sense of Entitlement

It seems my weeks have a corresponding focus/theme to them. This past week my focus was on gardening/yard work/spring cleaning. Traditional exercise went out the window since I was saving all my energy for manual labor and so did my journalling as I was either covered in dirt or my fingers too cramped to bother with writing things down. You may have noticed that I went a whole few days without blogging too!

With my focus temporarily off healthful habits and diverted to other productive activities, I noticed my desire for water & vegetables diminished and that with the intense outdoor activity, sun, and hot weather that some old cravings revisited me.

Midmornings I craved diet soda with an intensity that I had almost forgotten. When I came in for meals, I wanted substance and lots of it. In the hot, sweaty afternoons, I thought longingly about driving to Timmie's for an Ice Cap and after the day was done and the dirt washed off, I yearned for "real" ice cream. Where was this all coming from?

Most certainly, this past weekend would have brought me spiralling back into old habits if it weren't for all the accountability set up in the blogging, a deep desire to be free from old, destructive habits and what I can only claim to be supernatural, grace from God to stand firm. Instead of sucumbing, I decided to analyse what I was feeling. What was driving the cravings?

I could only come up with a couple reasons. First, I have to form some healthier food associations with the different seasons and celebrations in my life. The joy of summer needs to be more than frozen, sugary treats and caffinated drinks. It will take some time and reinforcement but if I keep pressing in, I know I can make the switch.

The deeper motivation, however, was a sense of entitlement. I was working hard doing things that stop being fun after a couple minutes. I declined invites to social events to work on projects and listened to some neighbors kicking back and enjoying life with abandon through the fence. I deserved a reward for all my hard work! I was entitled to enjoy life a little...after all...other people do. Surely I earned a treat.

It's a slippery slope and I know it. I talked myself down from the self gratification route reminding myself that I didn't deserve to undo all the positive choices I've made over the past 5 months just because the temperature rose over 80 degrees and I sweat a little. I didn't really want those foods that I have deliberately avoided because they would never satisfy me and would take me down a path I didn't want to go. I got through the long weekend with my sugar & caffiene resolve intact but I'll be honest, I did indulge in a McDonald's french fries before I caught on to what was happening!

Now it's back to our normal schedule and I've taken some time to reflect. I pulled out that journal and wrote down everything I could remember. It's not as bad as it could have been but it was pretty sloppy on autopilot.

Funny thing is, when I look back on my weekend I remember it as being very fun even with the hard work and lack of traditional treats. I don't have to go through painful withdrawl symptoms and that post-weekend slump that makes going back to work hard.

Now that is something a girl is entitled to!

I Scream for Ice Cream

Nothing is quite as satisfying at the end of a hot, hardworking day as a bowl of ice cream. Mmm...cold, creamy and sweet.

"Hey, wait a minute!" you say, "Ice cream? Melissa, that's not healthy."

Well, this is a traditional treat that I have experimented with over the past couple years and I've actually come up with a healthier alternative to the sugary, chemical laden original. Not only that, but I prefer it.

A good friend of mine bought an industrial strength blender that came with some ice cream recipes. These recipes used milk cubes, nut butter, natural sweetening agents and other wholesome ingredients which would blend to "ice cream" consistancy. My blender wasn't quite as strong as hers but it was new and up to the task. I found that by using the "ice" button and stopping it frequently to stir, I could get similar results.

It wasn't hard to figure out that I could use almond milk & butter, organic cocoa, agave nectar or maple syrup and other ingredients to suit my own preferences. The end result is not calorie-free by any means but it doesn't leave a coating on my tongue like store-bought ice cream does and it sits nicely in my stomach. No guilt either.

This method requires a little more effort than driving to the closest ice cream shop or scooping from a manufacturer's carton, but it's not completely disruptive to normal life. I usually get six to eight 1/2 cup servings from 2 ice cube trays and I store it away in plastic, single-serve containers so it is ready the next time the craving hits. That is, unless there are no other competing desserts in the house in which case my family gets into the action. We are usually fighting over the last drops in the blender. Never enough for the voracious ice cream appetites in my family.

Even though I've chosen not to indulge in McDonald's Sundaes and McFlurries, Wendy's Frosties, Cold Stone, Baskin Robins, Dairy Queen, or grocery store frozen treats...I've still found a way to include ice cream into my diet in a healthy, moderate way. Smile.

Garden Giddy

In my passion to pursue a healthy lifestyle, I have been inspired to grow some of my own vegetables. This isn't a new desire. I began this endeaver three years ago but took last year off due to other demands in my life. I didn't think I'd be able to squeeze this horicultural chore into my life again after taking a full-time job but I'm making a go at it.

Sunday afternoon & evening, I spent 8 hours breaking up the sod-like weeds that developed in my garden plot while it sat fallow. How could the weeds be this bad? I try not to be overcome with the futility of my work as I think about the thousands of weeds I've pulled from this same ground over the years. I always make every effort to get the roots, but they come up again and again.

Part of me wants to get some Round-up and spray my plot like a crazed, weed-attacking woman. Of course, this is a dangerous weed killer that we don't want to find in our vegetables so I suppress my weed anihilating fantasies and content myself with shaking the dirt from the thick mat-like clumps and plucking the stray pieces from the newly hoed ground.

At the end of my work I was black with dirt, sunburned, blistered, stiff and sore...but happy.

After a hot, soapy shower I fell into bed and fell asleep. I awoke all through the night with throbbing arms and sore back. In the morning I found myself unable to bend over, twist, or hold a pen. Maybe I overdid it a little? I went through my day feeling like I had been in an accident. Did you know that every hour of yard work burns 330 calories? Ahhh...the joys of gardening. I've never felt closer to an eighty year old arthritic woman...so why do I do this?

• There is no feeling like looking at a plot of black, freshly turned soil just waiting for vegetable plants to be planted in neat rows and know that for one day at least, I won over the weeds.
• The outdoor work takes me into the sun, mucking in the dirt, away from computers, cars, stores and the t.v. where I can think in solitude for hours at a time. It's the one place my kids will not bother me in fear that they will be recruited to help me.
• It fills me with parental pride to see my vegetable plants grow and bud as I tend to weeding, feeding and watering when the rain doesn't.
• I love the thrill of spotting the first tiny vegetables emerging out of no-where with the promise of harvest in days to come.
• I love the feeling of plucking the firm, ripe, warm vegetables, carrying them into the house like a warrior bringing in the spoils and setting them on my cool, clean, kitchen counter.
• I love washing, preparing and eating something that I helped produce. To me it tastes juicier, sweeter and tastier than anything I have ever bought in the grocery store and I can say, "That came from my garden" to anyone eating with me. They can't taste the difference, but I can.

That's why I do what I do.

Supplemental Satisfaction

My search for reasonably priced supplements for my whole family began and ended in Nutrition House at Devonshire Mall. The intention was to visit the store, ask for recommendations based on Don Colbert's list, and do some online research later. I even warned the friendly store clerk when I entered that I was "looking only".

I've been in the store before and each time the same guy is there. He is very knowledgable and lacks that arrogant aloofness that usually surfaces when I question product claims or otherwise display knowledge that may conflict with making a sale. Attentive, knowlegeable, pleasant but not pushy.

"I want a daily vitamin, Omega 3 Oil, and Phytonutrient powder for my husband & I and for my kids...and I don't want it to cost a monthly car payment."

He laughed and asked me some qualifying questions.

"How old are your kid's?"

"Would they like chewable or liquid?"

"For the oil do you want capsules or liquid?"

Then he said these convincing words with complete sincerity, "I'll show you the products I would use myself".

The line-up of supplements he selected according to my specifications were several different brands in economic, bulk sizes. He left me to examine the labels while serving other customers. The claims were in line with what I've educated on. Looked good. I peeked at the servings each contained and the prices. Looked very good!

By the time Shane (I looked at the receipt and found his name listed) was done with his customers I was ready to purchase the goods. At these prices I could afford to do my research by trial. It was just an added bonus to find out that my Nutrition House loyalty membership would send me a check for $10 and I was given a free fabric shopping bag to carry my supplements home in. Altogether a very satisfying purchase experience.

Shawn eyed my collection of bottles warily when he got home later that day. When I told him how long they would last and how much they cost compared to the online companies we priced, he relaxed visibly. The monthly cost was still a significant investment but it was a third of the projected car payment.

We were all a little scared of the liquid Omega-3 Fish Oil that I opted for instead of capsules. I was trying to save us all from having to digest the capsules and I was reassured that the oil would taste mildly like lemons. No fishy taste. We were surprised to find this true.

My kids were fairly co-operative with the exception of Trysten and the phytonutrient powder. He doesn't like OJ on it's own but less when it's green! Even he gave it his best we started chanting, "Chug it, chug it, chug it!"

The most exciting outcome was Shawn's enthusiasm. Like me, he'd wanted to get on a solid supplentary system as a family. I've already noticed him making extra efforts to eat better. Not perfect, but better.

I know supplements are not a magic bullet but I've made a lot of changes and this feels like a natural extension of what has been started. If it inspires my family to be more health-conscious too, well that's just a bonus!

Supplemental Surprise

The 6th Pillar of Health is Supplementation. I find this pillar to be especially daunting but Dr. Don Colbert clarifies much of the mystique by stating that all the average person really needs is:

• A Multivitamin/Multimineral supplement

• An Omega-3 Fish Oil capsule

• Phytonutrient powder (Green, red, orange, purple).

Sounds simple enough. Of course, he recommends high quality versions of these and warns about the downfalls of using inferior products with fillers, rancid oils and impotent nutrients.

Since January I have completed a 30-day Herbal cleanse and I'm just finishing up a 30-day Heavy Metal cleanse. During cleanses I didn't supplement at all because the focus was on making sure I took the capsules particular to those routines. Before and in between cleanses I used some drugstore-grade vitamin samples my doctor gave me and some leftover products from other programs I've tried. Nothing fancy.

The truth is that I've always been a terrible supplement taker and it's an accomplishment in itself to actually consistantly consume any products that I buy. It's incredible that I've been able to "take my pills" consistantly thus far.

With a mere 5 days before the end of the Heavy Metal cleanse I am looking ahead to my future supplementation needs and hoping to make a smooth transition from the cleanse to my new supplements.

Then I began to price them. Ouch.

My supplementation fancy wasn't just for me but for my whole family. We all should be taking vitamins. After a visit to a few online sites, however, I realized that to buy what we would need on a monthly basis for our family would be the equivalent of a car payment! I didn't even have to have the obligatory talk with Shawn to know that it wasn't going to happen. Even if we were really wealthy, would we spend that kind of money on vitamins on a regular basis? I don't think so, but I guess people do.

We are going to begin supplementing though and my plan is to do my research to find products that contain what we need for a price we can swallow....literally. This could take some time. Does it work if you take 1/2 doses of quality products every other day?

Shawn is still in the stone age. He thinks Flinstone vitamins are all the kids need.

I was wary about posting my search for affordable supplements because I want to be able to do my research without undue pressure to buy from any particular source and I have no desire to sell supplements in order to get them at a discount...if you know what I mean. I do invite anyone who knows of reasonably good products that meet Don's specifications above to point them out for my online or catalogue review. No meetings or presentations please.

This is going to be interesting! I'll keep you posted.

Integrated Exercise

Coaching is a big thing right now in certain circles. One of the exercises that is required by a life coach is the mapping of an "Ideal Week". I have to chuckle a little because I'm not a life expert but mapping my "Ideal Week" and posting it on my fridge has been a natural habit for me. It was one of those behaviours that my friends and relatives would stop to comment on: both with admiration and a little troubled shake of the head. Who does that? Up until recently, I was the only one I knew who did.

I used to have a more flexible schedule so I would use my ideal schedule to structure my days and weeks to make sure that all my "big rocks" got in my jar first so that the "little rocks, pebbles, and sand" wouldn't crowd them out. You know the story.

Funny thing is, that "Ideal Week" has been missing off my fridge since I started working full-time. I was kind of doing the shuffle in my head but abandoned my notions of being able to fit it all in. There are rocks, pebbles and sand all over the place in, under, around and over my jar and I didn't want to see it on paper.

The recent popularity of the "Ideal Week" schedule and my ever constant effort to somehow fit exercise into my lifestyle has inspired me to try my hand at time management again. I was pleased with how my new schedule looks, but in the end--exercise just didn't fit without bumping something else important out, infringing on our family dinner hour, or stoking my metabolism right before bed! What is to be done?

I decided that if I am going to exercise more often I am going to have to get very creative at "working it in" or as my blog title suggests...integration. "Exercise integration" has a completely different meaning in the fitness industry but for my purposes it means blending exercise with life. I was going to have to brainstorm ways to add physical activity to my day without depending on formal blocks of traditional exercise. I kind of already do that when I get on my stationary bike everytime my family & I sit down and watch our recorded Biggest Loser episodes. That's good but now it's time to take it to a whole new level.

Today at work, I was having trouble staying warm after a chilly morning and a frosty protein shake so I set a timer and did jumping jacks for 1 minute. Thankfully no-one saw me but at this point I don't think I would care if they did. I sat back down to my computer feeling a bit warmer and my metabolism moving a bit quicker. Nice. An hour or so later I did this again only with knee raises. That was it until another stint on the stationary bike at home. This may be how it has to be at this stage in my life.

I am still brainstorming. What other 1 minute exercises can I do? Can I arrange to ride my bike to/from work one day a week? What other tasks do I do that I could pair with physical activity of some kind. Sure, I'll be blessed enough a few times a week to get a "real" workout in, but these extras are going to make a huge difference between getting by and getting fit.

I'll keep you posted and you can let me know if you have any inspired ideas!

Fail to Plan, Plan to Fail

It is comical to me that in the wake of extolling the virtues of my revived journalling habit, I would have the most significant ambush to my healthy habits thus far and failed it big time. I wonder if I will learn from this mistake so I don't repeat it again. If you have read previous blogs you will see that I have seen hints of this scenario before and didn't take heed. A wiser soul would have done something to head off this problem months ago, but sadly, I didn't.

It started innocently. My husband called my extension at work.

"Tim (an fellow employee) bought donuts for the volunteers and there's a Blueberry muffin for you, do you want it?"

I think about my projected calorie intake for the day.

"No, I better not."

"I thought you like the blueberry muffins and Tim bought it just for you" This time my husband is more persistant.

I contemplated the situation a little more carefully. I did kind of put it out there that I would eat Tim Horton's Blueberry Bran Muffins and if someone went out of their way to order me one...I shouldn't turn it down. Wouldn't want to hurt anyone's feelings.

"Okay," I back down, "I'll have it instead of the snack I packed."

The Tim Horton's bag was delivered via one of the volunteers and I opened it to find that that the blueberry muffin was NOT bran, but the low-fat, high sugar version instead. In addition to this, there was an Old Fashioned Plain donut in the bag as well. Miscommunication. I closed the bag quickly and ran down the hall to reception. My efforts to off-load the forbidden treats were unsuccessful. Apparently my campaign to raise health awareness at the office has succeeded and no-one wanted the muffin or the donut. I thought about this and decided that I would keep the treats but bring them home to my children instead. They might want them. Big mistake.

Later in the day, a time-sensitive project landed on my desk that prevented me from leaving on time. As dinner-time approached I was having more and more difficulty concentrating on my work. I had no more food packed in my lunch and had no desire to begin scavenging in my co-workers offices as I have done on two previous occasions. I remembered the Tim Horton's treats and without serious debate of any kind, decided to eat both treats in lieu of supper.

Neither of them tasted that good to me. The muffin was almost sickeningly sweet and the donut was heavy with fat. I would never have chose either of those items to indulge in on my worst eating day!

My short-term objective was achieved. I was able to continue my work and a couple hours later I left the office tired and bleary-eyed. I dragged myself through my grocery shopping and when I got home at 9pm, I was exhausted beyond all reason.

My family wanted to watch a taped episode of the Biggest Loser and I typically use my stationary bike when we view it. This time, I was so tired, I just collapsed on the couch instead.

Of course the baked items did not register as a "real" dinner so I began a procession of foods during the next hour. Not good. This was not a shining example of healthful eating.

If I was to do things over again, I would've just been firm on declining the muffin or at the very least asked some more qualifying questions about it and by now I should have a stash of healthful snacks at work. We'll see if I learn from this mistake. Fortunately, it was isolated to that evening. I suffered from some energy depletion, a headache and a serious craving for coffee the next day but I recognized it for what it was and it went away. Made much better choices after that!

Week of the Journal

If last week could be defined as the "Week of the Dehydrator", this one is the "Week of the Journal". My purse-sized, black book has kept me very busy along with other events this week.

Thankfully, my "Victory over Attitudes, Habits & Addictions" class is over and my Wednesday PM's are free now until August at least. I could use the room in my schedule with gardening season coming up and an itch to plant my own veggies this year. It's a good thing too that my journal should soon need less tending to after an initial period of calculations and food logging gives way to some duplication...with the exeption of my adventurous recipe-making that is.

As frustrating as it has been to see the numbers associated with my current eating/exercise plan and to face some flaws in my approach, it has been beneficial on many levels.

1) I was eating far more calories than I needed to. One example is my delicious, healthy lasanga made with fresh veggies, lean ground turkey and mozzerella cheese. A small slice was 300 calories and it was easily a 1/3 of what I would normally consumed. Wow, no wonder I was feeling overfed!

2) With my metabolism balanced now, I'm not experiencing that sluggish feeling after meals or sense of having a full stomach before bed.

3) I'm becoming mindful of the need to balance my menu so that I'm getting the food groups and calories right. If I want to feel satisfied throughout the day, maybe I should eat those apples and carrots instead of juicing them. Leave the juicing for a more occasional treat unless I'm ready to "man-up" to those more healthy, vegetable-only concoctions.

4) My water drinking has taken on new life. It was easy for me to consume as little as two cups of water a day even in the absence of any other alternative. I knew this habit was slipping but the check boxes on my journal have been a great reminder. Now I'm back where I need to be.

5) Supplementation has improved. I am still in the midst of the heavy metal cleanse and that is going well, but a friend asked me about another supplement I was taking that needs to be rubbed on the skin. I had to admit that I had stopped administering it and needed to restart. My journal has a place to list supplements and it was easy to pick up my Wild Yam cream and put it to work with a place to log my progress. 21 days on, 7 days off.

6) Mindful exercise. Of course I know exercise is important but it's even more vital if you want to eat healthy, nutrient-dense foods instead of low-cal, diet foods. I have a sedentary job now and and the reality is, if I want to eat--I have to workout.

7) I lost weight! This was a bit of a shocker. I haven't finished a week yet and my daily totals haven't been all that great because of calorie overages and missed exercise but I was DEFINITELY eating less than I was before and it showed. I'm suspecting that my BMR (Basal Metabolic Rate-the amount of calories burned every day without exercise) is higher than the calculation but I'll leave that alone for now. If I keep losing weight, I'll have no problem adding some food to my daily intake!

I was a little concerned at first as to whether journalling would be a step backwards for me into my past of obsessive weight issues. The past months of purposing not to track anything was a great reprieve as I worked out some other behaviours. After a very focused week however, I see that so long as I can keep health and not weight-loss as the goal--my journal can be a very helpful tool.

Calorie Overload

I am so not impressed at this moment in time. I didn't workout today even though I left work a little early because I chose to prepare a wonderful birthday for our son Josh and his girlfriend, Courtney. It was our first visit with Courtney and I wanted everything to be nice. I should probably workout now that they are gone but I'm tired, frustrated and just want to vent before I go to bed.

This is day two of journalling and I can see that there is a lot of work ahead of me. I eat too much! Why am I always hungry??? I don't do hardly any physical activity anymore so why do I feel like a football linebacker 6x a day???

Yesterday I asserted self-control and did some exercise and squeaked by with a calorie deficit of -118 calories. Today, I again exercised self-control (compared to me without the journal), I don't feel like ever felt completely full today, didn't get any exercise beyond a short stroll with my family, and I was a whopping +701.5 calories over!!! I had a minute portion of steak, passed up the potatoes, corn, butter and Baskin Robin's Ice Cream Cake and I still completely overloaded on calories. Aghhhh!

I realize that journalling is only a mirror of my behaviours and this information is important to my healthful progression but I liked it so much better when I was in blissful oblivion. Numbers can be cold and unmoving. The reality is however, that this is happening whether I hold the mirror up or not.

The numbers are the real thing and I am going to have to learn to deal if I want them to work in my favour. In the past, reality like this would send me running to unhealthy, weight-loss based, who-cares-about- health-really diet and for a while I would feel in control.

This time is different. I'm going to continue eating the high quality foods that I have learned to love, but I am going to have to say that awful word to myself a little more often. You know, the "N..word". "NO". I've had practise with saying "no" to coffee and later, saying "no" to sugar. Now I'm going to have to learn to say "no" to extra servings, bigger portions and those "just one more bite" moments.

I'm also going to have to concentrate on my success...the little ones throughout the day like I mentioned above. Seriously, I did really good at dinner tonight and I didn't overeat today. Tomorrow will be better.

Bringing It Together

I feel confident that the processed sugar & caffeine abstinence has become a permanent lifestyle change. I know this because I had a diabetic friend over who is usually the recipient of my vacilating diet trends and I had very little to give her this time around. Usually I have an unfinished case of diet coke, plenty of treats with sugar substitutes, splenda, etc that I purchased, began to consume and then thought the better of it. My friend has no such scruples and is delighted to benefit from my chronic indecision. This time all I had was two sugar-free condiments (barbeque sauce & syrup) and some protein bars that my mom had given to me. Slim pickings now and it makes me feel great! Shawn's relieved too.

The exercise has picked up now that I have have settled into an after work/before dinner/before blogging routine that feels doable for the long run.

I have noticed however that my healthy, nutritionally dense diet has been exceeding my daily exercise expenditure. That's code talk for I'm eating more calories than I'm burning. This is due to 3 reasons that I can think of: 1) My food is more nutritionally dense (more calories) 2) My activity levels have been very low recently, even though now it's starting to pick up more and 3) I still have a fitness instructor's appetite! My 6P clothing is beginning to feel a little tight and my once-sculpted body is looking rather dough-boy like. Not the end of the world, but I have no desire to see the top my normal BMI range come and go.

Having conquerored some of my less-than-healthy habits and developed an appetite for more raw and nutritious foods, it is now time to make sure that I am staying within my daily recommended intake and exercise some appetite control. I can tell I haven't burned all the calories I've eaten at the end of the day just by the way my stomach feels when I go to bed at night. It's not a good feeling.

Perusing the hundreds of books at Chapters, I was searching for a diet & fitness journal where I could resume logging my daily food intake & workouts. I used to do this on my palm pilot but for some reason, I've always had more success with paper journals. I looked through countless diet books looking for meal plans that used the multitude of healthy foods I've been eating and couldn't find anything more than a week's example. The journals available typically reflected popular diets that had elements I wasn't interested in and/or needed a language translation to understand.

As we were leaving, I had one last thought. Go check the blank journal section of the store and maybe, just maybe, they'd have something generic there. I wasn't disappointed. I found a reasonably priced Diet & Fitness Journal that was small enough for my purse but detailed enough to contain & display all the elements of my healthy lifestyle. I began filling it out today.

This step is bittersweet for me. Most of the raw and nutritious recipes I've been trying don't display nutritional information so thankfully the journal has a general list of foods and their values in the back. I still have to use the internet to find information on items that aren't on the list. Writing things down is time consuming and I was kind of enjoying freedom from what has been an almost religious habit during my adult years. So why am I doing this? I guess, I need to make sure that I'm eating and exercising in balance.

Healthy, nutritionally dense foods, if overeaten or not combined properly, can contribute to unhealthy weight gain just like unhealthy foods can. I need to visualize what's going on so I can tweak my habits once again. Maybe if I get this worked out, I'll be able to put the journal away in the future or better yet, maybe I can fill the void on the wall of Chapters!